Feeling lousy

Feeling lousy. No, feeling beyond the maximum level of lousiness.

My man was feeling a little under the weather yesterday. So i decided to become his personal nurse without him knowing that i was gonna visit him as he assumed that i was wrapped up in my books to prepare for monday's BSAC1101 Accounting for decision making exam.

Despite the heavy downpour, i marched towards Toowong Village shopping centre to grab his fave japanese cuisine, fave banana & mango juice and a hearty fruit pudding to boost his appetite. As i was packing everything into a flashy new paperbag, i thought i'd get him some daisies to go with his fave turkish delight chocolate nuggets. Because i had paid the rent beforehand, i had also placed the remainder of my cash on hand inside the Hallmark bag the store provided me upon purchasing his 'get well soon' card.

Now i know what some of you are thinking: Why didn't you put them in your wallet instead you ding dong? My answer to that, ladies and gents, would be a simple, "I don't friggin know."

So anyway, after purchasing the flowers... OK you know what? i'll do you a chronological list instead:
- removed card the from the Hallmark bag,
- transfered card into the large paperbag containing food & flowers,
- crumpled the Hallmark bag,
- united Hallmark bag along with unwanted receipts into another plastic bag,
- tossed plastic bag into nearest bin on my way out,
- proceeded journey to his house.

And yes, the plastic bag that i threw away had the Hallmark bag in it.

And yes, the Hallmark bag had the remains of my cash on hand.

And FYI, cash on hand = A$360

It is true. Your very own noble sinner really did threw away three hundred and sixty dollars worth of cash into a garbage bin;
the same way a kid would toss away his enzyme-covered candy wrapper,
the same way ol granny would discard her snot-filled tissue paper,
the same way an average person would dispose of one's rubbish.

Somebody shoot me. Please.

Kelly Clarkson Battles Old Guy From Record Company

It was reported last week that Kelly Clarkson was told by Sony chief Clive Davis that her new album blew and they wanted to scrap it. Well, Ms. Clarkson wasn't having it . She's turning it out anyway. Judging from that first single, I'd say she might want to give ole' Clive a call back.

TMZ has confirmed that the 75-year-old music mogul asked for "significant" changes and wanted to put the brakes on the CD. But Clarkson wasn't having any of it -- especially since she wrote/co-wrote all the tracks on the record.

Sources tell us that Clarkson stood up to him and flat out refused to give in, and in the end she got her way.

One source told TMZ there is "deep tension" between Clarkson and Davis, adding, "She's definitely upset, but she's not a stupid girl."

I don't know what that last quote means. You can't be upset and smart at the same time? Or does it mean that she's stood up to him but won't go any further by complaining publicly about it because he's like the Great and Terrible Oz of the recording industry? Didn't he get Whitney off the pipe?

Source

Kevin Federline disses Britney Spears' boyfriend

Kevin Federline has apparently been trash talking Britney Spears' new boyfriend, musician Howie Day. A source says:

"When Kevin heard they had a sleepover at her house, everyone wanted to know about it. He lit up a cigarette and said he guessed you have to head to the dump to find trash, referring to how Britney and Howie met while in rehab."

I'm not sure if Kevin Federline is the most qualified person to be calling other people trash. I'm pretty sure he's more qualified to be an astronaut. Or, I dunno, a Japanese woman. Besides, one look at Britney Spears and you can tell this lady is all class. I'm surprised she didn't have her monocle on here. She must've left it with her top hat.

Source

Let the brain speak

Exactly a month today since i had my sip of Bombay Sapphire. I'm hoping that it would be the last.

To most, it seems like a so-what deal. But to me, it's a "wow" achievement. Top three reasons listed as follows:

1. Weekends
I have to start to make it a norm for meetings with my mates a non-alcoholic one. This applies to me and me only as the majority of my frens drink.

2. Residence
I live next to a freakin coldroom. Enough said.

3. Advertisements
New product all the time, new curiousity, new temptations.

"If i can live without it for one day, then i don't need it at all," was the saying of a wise fren of mine to me that kept me going strong. Sadly enough, it was a matter of NATO for the opposite party. I refuse to be the hypocrite and contradict myself this time of the year, or ever, for that matter, again.

It worked for the ciggies. And i have no doubt that it will work with the booze this time.

I am turning twenty soon. And i have to say, compared to my other frens who are more than three decades old, i have under-achieved. In fact, i am not even halfway there. Damnit i've blown my chances and i'm not gonna let history repeat itself once again.

I suppose the only solution left for me is to make the most of what i've got now and get on with it. Also i should stop comparing myself with others because if i do, and keep doing it, i will never be true to myself. Of course, it is vital to use others' success as an inspiration but i also have to familiarize myself with the fact that we are all gifted in our own special ways.

Man i have to spell out everytime for myself.

Because i'm highly indecissive see. Because some think i'm a big joke. Because some have put me down so low that even the lowest scum on to ever live could never ever go there.

Having said that, i wish no sympathetic messages from the rest because i want anything but. And to top it off, i am not seeking sympathy. Just jotting down what the brain thinks. Nothing wrong with speaking the mind. That's the beauty of blogging after all. So let me speak.

Fancy snapping images of yerself?

click!

My post today would be about reflection.

snap!

I've always wondered how true is the saying "What goes around comes around" and "You always get what you deserve". Then of course, there's karma; be it good or bad.

What keeps on throbbing in this hollow skull of mine is how far are those that revolve around us relevant to our actions? In other words, to what extent is our fortune propotional to our doings?

work that shutter baby

I know that it is indeed wrong to question our fate, or God's will for that matter. But at times i felt like i don't deserve what i am forced to endure. Then again, it could be one of those painful lessons in life, that shapes me to be the person that i am today, or in the near future. Then again, at this time, at this stage, do i really have to go through all those? Perhaps if i do have to at one point in my life, it would be when the situation is more... no, is LESS, trying? Sometimes i feel like having a handful of mischiefs [sp?] flooding my head, let alone my life, at once incredibly unbearable.

Take for example, the demand of a person whom i love dearly, not romantically, but just plain ol' dearly lurve, to eliminate a person whom i long for terribly, from my life. Now i know some might be rolling their eyes at this instant but note that this is not the debut occurance. In fact, this would be the same time, to the same type of person, but by a source that i could try to overcome with.

Your head spinning already? Relax. Take a chill pill. Read the paragraph again til it makes sense. Else, proceed below for further elaboration =p

All i can say is, i don't think i will allow this person to take away the best thing that has ever happened to me for a bloody long period of time. Now, it's on its way to destruction just because of this person's ego. Formerly, it was because He wanted to take her back. But now... I won't let it fly by. Not anymore. Not if i can prevent it too. I can't give up this person because...

Just because.

Then, a couple, both close friends of mine whom i once thought were a match made in you-know-where, are officialy divorced today. *sigh*

That was after his wife confessed that she fancied me.
And that his wife wanted to migrate to Brissy.
And after his wife departed with her ex-girlfriend.
And after his kid got "insured" by a pusher.
And after his wife appointed me fairy-godmama of her kid.
And after he admitted that he will not surrender heroin.
And after her sufferings finally met its limit.

Sounds surreal, no? Imagine yourself in my shoes. My veins are bulging on the sides of my temples. And, it does not stop there. There's plenty than where that came from.

I am also very concerned about a dear friend who has to nurture a to-be-nearly-formed family that exists way ahead of schedule.
I am also very confused about my relationship with Mr.RJ.
I am also very crushed about my academic performance.

Pening la. Peninggg aku.

So, you feeling a lil' vain?

Tell-Tale Signs

You can tell she's mad when she blares slipknot or marilyn manson on full blast.
You can tell she's upset when she starts munching on chocolates.
You can tell she's sad when cookies & cream ice-cream becomes her b'fast, lunch & dinner.

"Who is she?" You might ponder.

Why, it is i of course, your very own noble sinner.

And yes, i am sinning badly now. Very very bad. With food.

Quote from Mr.DM, "If food were drugs, i'd OD for sure."

Hmph. I'm getting there. Won't be too long before i start crash-dieting again so i can fit into my size 6 pants that boasted every curve a lady could possibly possess.

OK so i'm over-reacting, no doubt about that. But how can i not when everything is going too friggin fast for me, topped off with a hell load of crap going on. So not only am i enduring the loudness of the clock ticking right before my very eardrums, but it's also ticking at a pace so rapid that even the clock itself couldn't keep up with time.

Makes sense? No? Good.

Because that's the way things are going on at the mo - nonsense.

It's funny, not ironic, but just plain funny, how us beings are blessed with the capacity to caress and gifted with the ability to think. Yet, these two very simple fundamentals are often muddled-up. In other words, most would think with their heart and not their brain. Hence, the result is more often than not, futile.

Bear with me. When the time is right, all will be revealed.

In the meantime, *cough! cough!* will NS survive through this ordeal? Will the weapons of emotion destruction get the better of her?

Stay tuned to find out.

Oh barf

She's gonna rock the floor and i won't be there to rock it!

The caption on the flyer reads:
"'I've never heard so much bass come out of such a little person' - someone once said to BeXta after one of her sets. BeXta is known for her hard trance, bangin beats and energetic vibe created every time she hits the dex."

and...

"Bexta started producing and performing dance music in 1993, and extended her talents to dj-ing in 1996. She has graced the stage along side acts such as Bjork, Prodigy, Fat Boy Slim, Chemical Brothers, Basement Jaxx, Timo Mass, Carl Cox and John Digweed, at events like the Big Day Out, Gatecrasher, Slinky and Utopia. BeXta has held the tittle as Australia's No.1 female DJ now for a number of years."

UWAAA!!!

Forgive me for my tantrum but i am a massive fan of this lady. Number uno on my female OZ DJ's list. Second comes Neroli. Third is Amber Savage, who is spinning next week btw. So anyway...

UUUWWWAAA!!!